Beware! Children At Play [Blu-ray]
Blu-ray ALL - America - Vinegar Syndrome
Review written by and copyright: Eric Cotenas (6th March 2022).
The Film

Literary critic-turned-trashy sensationalist paperback writer John DeWolfe (Michael Robertson) travels with his wife wife Julie (Lori Tirgrath) and daughter Cara (Jamie Krause) deep into the New Jersey Pine Barrens to visit his Vietnam buddy Sheriff Ross Carr (Rich Hamilton) and his wife Cleo (Robin Lilly) who have not been the same since their daughter Amy (Lorna Courtney) vanished mysteriously three years before. After nearly hitting a child running across the road into the forest, DeWolfe learns from traveling salesman Franklin Ludwig (Herb Klinger) that there have been at least twelve child disappearances in the area and the backwoods locals – descendants of a preacher's cult who once massacred others they believed to be demons – have no faith in city-raised Carr to protect them and their children; their ire fueled by scoop-seeking local reporter Dale Hawthorn (Lauren Cloud). Carr reveals that the disappearances seem to follow a pattern and that he and puzzled-but-skeptical medical examiner Dr. Robert Fish (Rick Bitzelberger) are at the point where they are willing to consult a medium profiled in one of DeWolfe's books, especially once Carr's other daughter Mary Rose (Sunshine Barrett) vanishes after telling Cara about the "woodies" who have invited her to play. The medium Alice (Stephanie Jaworski) is vague, only telling Carr that his daughter is still alive but "changed." Their only other potential lead is religious fanatic farmer Braun (director Mik Cribben) who rants about how his missing son reappeared to him as a "goblin." When a couple making out in the woods see a group of children cannibalizing an adult while chanting phrases English teacher Julie identifies from the section of the epic poem "Beowulf" involving the cannibal Grendel, DeWolfe and Ross draw a connection between the children and a professor of Norse mythology (Dylan Dog: Dead of Night's Bernard Hocke) and his young son (Eric Tonken) – who may or may not be the children's teenage ringleader who calls himself Grendel (Danny McClaughlin) – who went missing in the woods ten years prior.

One of the more unusual Troma independent pickups, Beware! Children at Play manages to be quite ruthless yet ludicrous enough to undercut the effectiveness of its most taboo conceit during a climax. That the film so gleefully and gorily dispatches its adult characters whether they are nice or nasty turns out to be the means to a very specific end; and yet it is difficult to discern whether it was intended to be played with a straight face and ended up being unintentionally hilarious or if we can be thankful that the amateurish effects do not live up to the perverse sense of humor of the filmmakers (given some earlier, more proficiently-executed gag-worthy bits involving adult characters). Performances vary but lean towards wooden for the most part, making some actual plot development seem more like droning exposition, and robbing the backstory of any emotional resonance it appeared to be trying to convey. It is perhaps appropriate that the film has more in common with fellow Troma pickup The Children than the likes of Devil Times Five in terms of other films in the "killer tykes" genre. Ultimately, horror fans should consider Beware! Children at Play as a film that should be experienced at least once rather than dismissed altogether. The film was the sole directorial effort of Cribben who is better known in the industry as a camera and sound technician, starting on adult films like The Defiance of Good and The Naughty Victorians and later genre fare like Nightmare and Robot Holocaust, moving up to second unit on more mainstream East Coast-lensed films like The Eyes of Laura Mars, Annie, and Wall Street.
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Video

Released direct to video by Troma, Beware! Children at Play hit DVD at the dawn of the format in a tape-mastered transfer so any new transfer could only be better; indeed, Vinegar Syndrome's 1080p24 MPEG-4 AVC 1.85:1 widescreen transfer from a 2K scan of the original 35mm camera negative showcases the film at its best even when looking its worst. Daylight exteriors fare best, looking sharp and colorful while focus is not always spot on during night exteriors and interiors (with at least one short high angle master shot looking more like blown-up 16mm than 35mm). Some of the gore gags hold up well with the heightened resolution and others not so much.

Audio

The sole audio option is a DTS-HD Master Audio 2.0 mono track (mislabeled as stereo) boasting cleanly-recorded dialogue and synthesizer scoring – the sound design is sorely lacking in foley work that could have given some umph to the gore gags – while the SDH subtitles could have used a proof ("strung him up" is transcribed as "strong him up").
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Extras

Extras start off with an audio commentary by director Mik Cribben that starts out well but peters out just after the twenty minute mark, with long stretches of silence (some as long as ten minutes) and not even the major gore scenes seeming to warrant commentary. What we do learn is that the opening Steadicam shot was lensed by Steadicam operator James Muro (who himself helmed the indie horror film Street Trash and worked on films like Brain Damage and Maniac Cop before moving up to the likes of The Abyss and Field of Dreams before moving up to cinematographer with the dire Oscar-bait that was 2004's Crash. He also discusses the contributions of screenwriter Fred Scharkey who had been both an English professor and a seminarian, suggesting the latter may have had more to do with the script's eccentricities than the former.

Cribben is not featured in the documentary "Why I Don't Have Children" (51:06) which features remarks from several cast and crew members including effects artists Mark Dolson and Mark Kwiatek – who both worked on the SOV cult duo Video Violence and Video Violence 2 – who are surprised at the effectiveness of some of the gags in spite of a five hundred dollar effects budget, child actor Anthony Cartinella who was fascinated with make-up effects and whose parents were contacted by Dolson about working on the film, child actor Thatcher Long who recalls his pitchfork dispatching (as well as doubling in some gore insert shots), townspeople extra Peter Riga, composer Herschell Dwellingham who had his own home studio and wanted to get into film music, and Tigrath who recalls being killed off when she got married and moved to the West Coast during the year-long haitus between shooting periods.
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A far more informative contribution from the director comes in the new interview with director Mik Cribben (15:32) in which he recalls moving from theater in Canada to filmmaking in New York, stalling for some time on a thirty-page treatment for the film that he describe as "just the gory bits" before Scharkey took a crack at a draft. He recalls the fundraising, the shoot, an incident with the police which lead to their cooperation in providing a police car onscreen, and taking a note from Lord of the Flies director Peter Brook in encouraging the child actors to treat the action as play. The disc also ports over the shorter Troma interview with director Mik Cribben (3:54).

Packaging

The cover is reversible while the first 5,000 copies ordered directly from Vinegar Syndrome come with a special limited edition embossed slipcover designed by Richard Hilliard.

Overall

As silly as it is ruthless, Beware! Children at Play is a film that should be experienced at least once rather than dismissed altogether.

 


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